I’m not going to spoil your pleasure by dropping hints, but this is just wonderful. What wicked fun! Enjoy, my dears!

Sigh… They don’t make ‘em like they used to - or do they? Heh heh.

I thought you might like to see some real Australian animals.  I’ll tell you more about Broome and the Kimberley in another post - or several. Big subject, that!

If you’ve been following along, you’ll know I was invited to present a couple of workshops at the Romance Writers of Australia Roadshow in Perth, along with the amazing Keri Arthur (woot!) and the delightful Kelly Hunter, who is also our Madam Prez. I did a workshop on Deep Point of View and another on how to write sexy, which the organising gals called The Sealed Section. *snort* I had a load of fun and I learned lots of useful things. Hope everyone else did too. Hmm…

My Beloved and I had some spare time in Perth. Now Perth is a truly beautiful city. I love the wide Swan River and the fresh vibrant ambiance of the place, but… When we were there, the city turned on the worst weather EVER! Perth is always windy, but it was almost gale-force, honest. The rain blew in horizontal sheets. It was foul.  Also cold.

So what did we do? We went to the Zoo.  It’s a fabulous zoo, with all sorts of exotic animals, but I thought some of you might be particularly interested in Australian fauna.

This elderly dingo was off on his daily constitutional with his keeper. The ones we saw in the wild in the Kimberley didn’t look anywhere near so prosperous, just lean and mean.  But it gives you a good idea of these beautiful animals. Sadly, the station-owners lay baits for them, in order to protect their cattle and sheep. What that means is that the surviving dingoes often have to hunt alone rather than in a pack. So they can only prey on smaller animals, like bandicoots and numbats and other little furry critters. No wallabies or roos. The little guys have a hard enough time with feral cats and foxes. Not a good situation if you’re small and tasty and endangered already. *sigh*

This is a life size statue  of a Red Kangaroo in Perth. (Yeah, yeah, I know I promised real, but if you think I’d be snuggling up the real thing, you’re nuts!) I thought you might like to see the size of it. This is about as big as they get. Mind you, I’m not especially tall at 5ft 3in, but it’s impressive isn’t it? Gives a whole new impression of cute and cuddly roos. A big male like this can jump over 30 feet in one bound. You can also see how windy it is! Sunny Perth-  huh!

More on the Kimberley later. Don’t won’t to overload you with too many pictures of red rocks just yet…

An old Italian lived alone in New Jersey .  He wanted to plant his annual tomato garden, but it was very difficult work, as the ground was hard.

His only son, Vincent, who used to help him, was in prison. The old man wrote a letter to his son and described his predicament:

Dear Vincent,
I am feeling pretty sad, because it looks like I won’t be able to plant my tomato garden this year. I’m just getting too old to be digging up a garden plot. I know if you were here my troubles would be over..  I know you would be happy to dig the plot for me, like in the old days.
Love, Papa

A few days later he received a letter from his son.

Dear Pop,
Don’t dig up that garden. That’s where the bodies are buried.
Love,
Vinnie

At 4 a.m. the next morning, FBI agents and local police arrived and dug up the entire area without finding any bodies. They apologized to the old man and left.

That same day the old man received another letter from his son.

Dear Pop,
Go ahead and plant the tomatoes now. That’s the best I could do under the circumstances.
Love you,
Vinnie

BOOM! BOOM!

Oh dear! Couldn’t resist, sorry…

 It’s newsletter time, which means…

Rackety Kate and the Pirates

Chapter 19

Delightfully Devious

The story so far:
Duka has won his Duchess, but at the highest cost possible for a man like him. But he has a job to do. There are still more goods for sale…

You can read all of Kate here – http://www.deniserossetti.com/kate.html

Duka stepped out from behind the screen. “Settle down, rot ye!” he roared.

One by one, the pirates quieted, save for the occasional rumble of laughter.

His natural dignity unimpaired, Duka eyed the crowd with profound disfavour. “We have an auction to finish, goods unsold. Shall we get on with it, shipmates?”

“Aye!” The shout echoed around the forest.

“But I thought we’d see…” whispered Kate to Jack. “You know…Duka.”

He was holding her so closely that when he chuckled, she felt the reverberation through her whole body. Goose bumps of delight paraded down her spine. “You thought pirates weren’t capable of self-control? Harley and Chan will wait a little for their pleasure, you’ll see.”

Actually, it was the Rossetti woman Kate had her doubts about. Fortunately, the excellent common sense of her readers kept the crazy one in check. They wouldn’t rush headlong into sensual gratification, no way. A smug smile curved her lips. Rossetti’s readers were people of restraint and self-discipline, intelligent and discerning in their pleasures.

Absently, she nuzzled Jack’s shoulder, thinking how wonderful he smelled, of clean linen and warm healthy man. Sighing, she glanced up in time to see Harley and Chan tugging the screens aside as fast as they were able.

The scene on the stage hadn’t changed. Tom Cavanagh was still fastened to his St. Andrew’s cross, his cat now curled up against one big bare foot. The Count de Nothos still smouldered in his silver chains, Peter lay lounging on the couch with the Duchess’s leash in his hand, while she sat neatly on the floor near his feet, looking down her aristocratic nose.

“Let’s get to it, lads,” called Duka. “What am I bid for this fine gentleman here?” He waved at Tom Cavanagh, magnificently helpless.

“Wait,” croaked the First Officer. “Dammit, man, wait!”

***

Want more? You can read all of Kate and see more pirates on the Rackety Kate page. Want even more than that? Join my newsletter - see below.

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I’m so sorry. You must think I’ve abandoned you, or died, or something.

I’ve been totally buried in edits. And immediately after I finished the first lot, My Beloved and I went away to Perth. I did two workshops for a Romance Writers of Australia Roadshow there. Together with the amazing Keri Arthur and the delightful Kelly Hunter. My first workshop was on Deep Point of View - writing from inside your characters’ heads. I was blown away by some of the talent in the room. In the afternoon, I did a “Sealed Session”, all about writing erotic and sexy. It was quite a hoot, believe me. We covered all kinds of topics. *grin*

Then we flew up to Broome, in the northwest of Western Australia and did a trip out to the Kimberley, to Purnululu National Park, where the Bungle Bungles are - the most extraordinary mountain range, shaped like beehives, pierced by incredible gorges and chasms. It was HOT out there. More about it later, with pictures.

Since we’ve returned, I’ve been re-buried under edits and on the Deadline From Hell. I should surface next week. I love to chat with you, but I’m thinking that in the long run, it’s the book that matters. Yes?

Anyway, all positive thoughts will be greatly appreciated. I’m not the happiest of campers at the moment…