As love at first sight stories go, Michael Caine’s is a beauty. Apparently, Caine saw his future wife, Shakira, in a TV
commercial - and fell like a ton of bricks. “She was the most beautiful woman I had ever seen,” he said. “I fell madly in love with a girl who I did not know and might never find.” But of course, he did. 
They’ve been married 35 years and she’s still beautiful, IMO. Those bones… *sigh*
Now they’re doing scientific research on love at first sight. A study of 700 students at three British universities showed that one look can be enough to gauge whether a long-term relationship is on the cards or just a one-night stand.
According to the research, subtle
signals emanate from the shape of the jaw, nose size or narrowness of the eyes. We already know humans can judge a lot about another person from their face, including things like health and even some personality traits. But Ben Jones, from the University of Aberdeen’s Face Research Lab says, “…this really is the first study to show that people are also sensitive to subtle facial signals about the type of romantic relationships that others might enjoy.”
Lynda Boothroyd from Durham University’s psychology department adds, “…preferences for different types of face were actually quite strong. This shows that these initial impressions may be part of how we assess potential mates when we meet them.”
An earlier study at Ohio State University suggested that three minutes is all you need to make a good judgment about potential partners. Researchers paired off students and followed the progress of their relationships. They found that in the majority of cases, those who became closest had known that would be the outcome soon after meeting. 
Okaay…I’m not sure I believe in love at first sight. Yes, I believe in incredibly strong attraction at first sight, serious liking at first sight, total lust at first sight.
But - I know I want to spend the rest of my life with this person at first sight?? Hmmm…
When I first met My Beloved, I was attracted immediately. He was cute, funny, intelligent and more than a little drunk. (There’s something highly significant about that sentence. I must have had a premonition.) He also had a girlfriend - nice girl but a bit horsey looking. 
Meowowow. What was particularly exhilarating though, was that he “got” me - he laughed at my jokes, for instance. Millions of men in this world don’t. I can’t imagine why.
But marry him? Have his babies and grow old together? Nu-uh, not at once, not in those first few minutes. Conversely, I’ve definitely had intense dislike at first sight experiences. The best example being a woman who was as nice as pie to my face, but for some reason I knew she hated me, though all my other friends said I was nuts. And I was right. *sigh* She did.
What’s your experience? Do you believe in love (not lust, liking or attraction) at first sight - real, true committed love? I would be so delighted to hear it happens - and that it works Happily Ever After! Perhaps it’s just a matter of degree?
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Okay, me first. I’m a believer. I met my husband at 16. The heavens parted, angels sang and the very first thing that popped into my head were the words - I’m going to marry this man. Took less than a minute.
I mean I was 16 - didn’t really understand the intracies of lust or attraction although he had damn fine legs. 
Still freaks me out!
22 years and counting just gone (18 married). You do the math
Hmm…… What an interesting question Denise,
Is it love when you can’t keep your eyes off “HIM”:cool:from the far side of a large smoke filled room with a hundred writhing, sweaty, dancing bodies between you.
When you wait for “HIM” with eager anticipation, to walk through the door.(even many yrs on)
When you think each others thoughts and even finish each others sentences, or crave the same desires. Yeah!!! I believe that such a thing as REAL LOVE can exist and hit you right between the solar plexus. Especially when you not prepared for it….
Maryde
This post explains so much. I watched “Die another day” again this week and there was (at least) one scene where James Bond meets a girl and within three minutes they’re heading for the bedroom. Now you’ve explained all, it must have been poor acting that made that scene look stilted and contrived.
I’m the kind of person who’ll walk down the street with a friend and the friend will say “Wow, did you see his butt?”. My response will be “Who?”. I notice hands, I notice body language, but I’m always removed from it - I don’t personalise my interaction unless I actually speak with someone. It took me nearly two years to decide I even wanted to go out with my partner - that coincided with the time I first noticed how firm his butt was (he’s a dancer). No one has ever called me ’speedy’.
btw was going to put a link in for the movie but couldn’t work out how to do it here.
Instant lust, attraction, hots etc. Absolutely. Instant love, no. I don’t believe in it, or rather I have never experienced it. I need the time to know somebody, to build up trust, familiarity, and a degree of comfort, before I can open myself up. I guess I’ve always known that I fall hard, and should be careful where I let myself go. Time makes my emotions run hotter rather than colder and I need that time to build up the feelings I need, to get the “head of steam” going. Then caboom! Things get interesting and all my senses get involved: I’m interested in the smell, look, taste, sound and feel of him, (not forgetting his humour, personality etc…
).
I can’t say that I’ve ever had a love a first sight moment, althought I wish for it. I still believe that it can happen though. It just may not happen they way you see it happen in the movies or on TV. For my mom and step dad it seemed to happen. They met at a mud boggin/tractor pull compition (yes, I’m a country bunkin…LOL), were married within three months of meeting and are still going strong after almost 28 years. Someday I hope to be just as happy!
For me it was lust at first sight that over months turned into a love that has lasted for 33 years.
It didn’t happen that way for me. But for my friend Harold it did. He says she moved in across the street and flagged him down to ask about the days trash was picked up on the street. Over a smelly trash can he fell in love and they have 35 years under their belt to show for it. Strange but true.
Amy, that is simply amazing.
Also wonderful! As you say, it’s particularly mind-boggling given how young you were, but your instincts were obviously spot-on.
Did your husband have similarly strong feelings?
Apart from PHROARRRRRR, she’s hawt, that is! I’d be so interested to know.
Maryde, I definitely think it’s possible to grow closer and closer over the years. Also possible to grow further apart, but that’s a whole different post. It certainly sounds like you were intensely attracted from the word go. How lovely - but I suspect the way you are now is even better!
Elaine, you must be like a friend of mine. We were out walking by the river one day and an entire football team jogged past us. When I got my breath back, I said, “Wow! Did you see that?”
And she said, “See what?” Collapse of small stout party.
Presumably, you’re not an impulsive person and the gradual rate of your involvement was perfect for you. It fitted. Not only that, it obviously worked! And yes, there’s a great deal to be said for a nice firm backside. *sigh*
Susan, I feel very like you do. Instant lust, yep, no worries. But it takes me much much longer to give my real trust and trust is an essential ingredient for a relationship to work, it goes without saying. But I do recall being absolutely fascinated by his hands and forearms.
I worked my way around to the other places in due course.
OMG, Dani I LOVE it! Love among the tractors, it’s simply gorgeous. And how good is that they’re happy all those years later. Sweet!
Same here, Cathy. So nice when there’s more to it than hot bodies.
Oh my Lord, Clynax, first Dani’s muddy tractors, then smelly trash! Just goes to show how love can be mundane and glorious at one and the same time. Thanks for telling us about Harold, what a delightful story!
You are all restoring my faith in love at first sight.
No sadly it took my hubby a couple of months or so to realise what I’d known all along
I guess I’d like to qualify though. Had he opened his mouth and been dumb as a rock or drowned little kittens or made crude jokes that flash would have fizzled quite quickly. Although the fact that he has completely opposite politics to me didn’t seem to bug me too much. And yes, there was a degree of lust happening there too. But I stand by my initial reaction. I didn’t think OMG I’m going to do this man until his ears bleed. It was most definitely I’m going to marry this man.
I comment on here yesterday and the damn thing isn’t here!
Let’s try again.
I spotted my future Hubby from behind only and new I had to follow him. Mmmmm, yes just a bit stalkerish. It was a few months before we crossed paths, this time face to face, and I have to say no big flash of lightning, no big boom, just ahhhh….. there he is! So the rest they say is history. Three months of dating before the wedding (and no it wasn’t a shotgun wedding) and we’re the proud parents of four kids and looking at our 20th anniversary in June. So yeah, I believe in love a first sight, well a ‘knowing’ at first sight.
Oh, I believe in love at first sight! Hubby and I were in our early twenty’s, I worked at a gas station, he came in for gas…we met in May and married in August!! Just short of three months from meeting to married! This August will be 28 years.
Hubby is reading over my shoulder and says “Oh yeah it was love at first sight!! Still is!!”
*sigh*
(pssst, and he’s two years younger than me!!
)
So Amy - your initial physical reaction was reinforced by your first interaction in that he was clever enough and nice enough not to mess up. I do have to say I’ve met some very attractive men and after three seconds in their company I wouldn’t take them stripped, oiled and wrapped in a bow. I’m so very glad the dear man got it right. Sounds like he continues to do so.
Note to self - check out the legs. Does he own a pair of those bike shorts? Please say yes!
From behind, Rachel? Hmm… Okay, I HAVE to ask - does he have bike shorts too? I, um, really really like bike shorts - on the right guy. Gosh, don’t quite see how, but this conversation has, erm, descended somewhat.
Oh what a sec, it’s me and my dirty mind. Nothing like a beautiful bum. *sigh*
Oh Kim, love over the petrol pump! That’s so sweet. And a younger man too - good on ya, mate! Not only that, he’s obviously a keeper.
Think I need to think more seriously about love at first sight in my books, as in dumping a character right in it. But damn, my heroine doesn’t think much of our hero at first sight. Or perhaps that’s because, deep down, she fancies him rotten… Hmmm…
Oh yeah! Hot butt! He’s younger than me too. Not by much, well, not even a year, but when I first saw his butt he was still in high school and I wasn’t!!! Anyway, he was out when we hooked up (about six months later) and I was 19 he was 18. Gotta love a great butt!
Love for me is the realization that you want to spend your life with this person. I believe that takes time… so unless your “first sight” encompasses several days where you aren’t out of each other’s proximity (so you don’t dip into “second sight”). Perhaps it is splitting hairs, but when I hear people speak of love at first sight, where they know this is who they want to spend their life with, I am more inclined to think it is a premonition of love than actual love. Or lust. But my romantic edge gives most people the benefit of the doubt.
Rachel, another younger man story.
But hey, he was out of school, so you can’t be accused of cradle snatching. Anyway, everyone knows cradle snatching doesn’t apply if there’s a gorgeous tight backside involved. 
I suspect I’m with you, Jen. But then, we have people here that it’s happened to and they have the children and the marriages to prove it. Perhaps it’s all just a matter of semantics. And chemicals. But I’ll post on the chemistry another day. Very interesting though…
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